Part of Me
by DocMcRegals
Summary: Lyrics by Katy Perry...Addison's POV about her life after leaving SGH...it gets AU at the end


**OOC: Okay so this is me trying something out...I tweaked the lyrics of a song, just a bit...Its of course Addison inspired...I'm using Katy Perry's "Part of Me" and its AU from Addie's POV about when she leaves SGH after her marriage to Derek falls apart and she breaks the 60 day no sex pact with Mark...pay attention to the chorus...and it's not gonna seem AU until the end...**

**I do NOT own the characters or the song**

**I give credit where credit is due: Shonda Rhimes-who created the characters and the show and Katy Perry-it's her song**

**happy reading, **

**Xoxo, Dee**

_Days like this I want to drive away_

_pack my bags and watch your shadows fade_

_you chewed me up and spit me out like I was poison in your mouth_

_you took my life you weighed me down but that was then and this is now...now look at me_

"Why is there a letter of resignation on my desk?" Richard asked Addison one afternoon as she scrubbed out of surgery

"I told you I got a job offer"

"I don't want to hear this again: working at a private medical co-op, moving to LA, this is not my Addison; my Addison is a world class neonatal surgeon, my Addison lives to cut"

"Your

Addison would have been promoted to chief of surgery so stop 'Addisoning' me… I want a change, I need a change and this is how I'm gonna do it: in LA with those people…Now I can walk away angry or I can walk away with your blessing, either way Richard, I'm going"…

I needed change...My marriage ended over a sleezy pair of panties and a doe eyed looking intern...I needed change. I had to get out of dreary ass Seattle-and fast. So of course when Naomi offered me the job, I took it...there was no need for me to stay in Seattle...I'd lost Derek, Mark...well he was never mine anyways...and Karev...he was...I was desperate, depressed and horny...I needed change...

_This is the part of me that you're never gonna ever take away from me no,_

_this is the part of me that you're never gonna ever take away from me no,_

_throw your sticks and stones throw your words and your blows_

_but you're not gonna take my soul no_

_this is the part of me that you're never gonna ever take away from me no_

_I just wanna throw my phone away_

_find out who is really here for me_

_you ripped me off your love was cheap was always tearing at the seams_

_I fell deep and you let me drown, that was then and this is now, now look at me_

Derek and Mark

We weren't that great of a couple. On paper we looked good, but other than on paper, we weren't compatable...He stopped caring; he stopped paying attention to me. I am NOT the kind of woman you don't pay any attention. I had reservations about marrying Derek...like when I found out his mother NEVER liked me and my parents HATED him...but I married him because everyone said we were perfect together, which we were...on the outside...After the affiar when I moved to Seattle, he didn't treat me the same, it was if...I was an obligation to him; he chose me out of obligation-NOT because he loved me...When I found the panties, I was...relieved. I had a chance to leave, get the hell out of rainy ass Seattle, but I couldn't leave just yet...I'd made friends, okay well, Callie and Bailey and I had Mark when he moved out here, when I wasn't busy hating his guts or trying to break up fights between him and Derek...and when we weren't sleeping with each other...or when he wasn't off screwing every nurse...I'd always had a thing for Mark, and he'd always had a thing for me ever since med school, but he wasn't 'Forbes Montgomery material' so I went with the safe choice and chose Derek...Now, Now I am utterly and completely alone...

_This is the part of me that you're never gonna ever take away from me no, _

_this is the part of me that you're never gonna ever take away from me no, _

_throw your sticks and stones throw your words and your blows but you're not gonna break my soul no_

_this is the part of me that you're never gonna ever take away from me no_

I'm glad I decided to take the job in LA; Its new, it's something different...It's...I get a fresh new start in a place where no one knows me. In LA I'm not "Addison Montgomery-Shepherd" or "The cheating whore" or the "adultrous bitch" or "Satan" I'm just... I'm Addison...

_Now look at me I'm sparkiing_

_a firework a dancing flame_

_you won't ever put me out again I'm glow-in oh woah_

_you can keep the diamond ring_

_It don't mean nothin anyway _

_in fact you can keep everything yeah, yeah, except for me_

Leaviing Seattle isn't as hard as I thought it would be. Its...well I feel stronger than I've ever felt...I signed the divorce papers and gave my wedding rings back to Derek-I could really care less what he does with them...Mark, well I left him something a little more special...

_This is the part of me that you're never gonna ever take away from me no,_

_this is the part of me that you're never gonna ever take away from me no,_

_throw your sticks and stones throw your words and your blows but you're not gonna take my soul no_

_this is the part of me that you're never gonna ever take away from me no..._

He's standing there, they're standing there shocked. Addison's just given Derek the divorce papers with her wedding rings inside. He should feel better, happier, freeer, but he doesn't. He's now officially free to be with Meredith, but it doesn't stop him from feeling bad. She was his family for 11 years and she, well he just gave it all away...

"Addison's gone" Mark says as he stands next to Derek at the nurses' station

"Yeah I know...she gave divorce papers, and her wedding rings" Derek said

"She left me something too" Mark says, his eyes fixated on the entrace, where he'd watched Addison walk away from him

"What'd she leave you? some really great goodbye sex?" Derek asked sarcastically, causing Mark to become instantly pissed

"No, even better" Mark says as he reaches into the pocket of his dark blue scrubs and pulls something out:

a pregnancy test with two little plus signs...

_This is the part of me_

_This is the part of me_

_Throw your sticks and stones throw your words and your blows but you're not gonna break my soul no_

_this is the part of me that you're never gonna ever take away from me no..._


End file.
